Beats Entropy

“ I gave him a flat look, then replied in numb, disappointed, tone. “No, it’s clearly madness. I don’t really think that’s a debatable point.”

The directors shrugged admissivly. “You can clean out your desk. Your services are no longer needed.” Zhang’s triumphant laugh shook the room with maniacal force.”

I stalked back to my desk intent on leaving. As I sat, dissembling my blanket nest and security system, the members of my team gather around my pod. “Is it true, Poppa AJ; did they really lay you off?” asked Clophistra, the second most loyal of my work group.

I couldn’t bring myself to look her in the eye: so I stared at one tit and the corner of my filing cabinet “Are calling me a liar, Clophistra?” The team growled ominously.

“What? No, You didn’t even say anything.” Oh she was good; she was damn good.

“Fair enough… yeah they fired me. Replaced me with a crate of military grade hobos” Gary, who I don’t think was actually on my team, screamed and plunged his hand into a jar of pushpins. The team proper shook and wept like very sad Jello.

Jessie started keening “Hoooboooooss Hooooboooooos….”

“Enough!” I said, skipping a slap across the nearest three faces. “I didn’t pull y’all [1] up from the depths of office drudgery to have you fall at the first sniff of genetically enhanced transients.” I waited a moment until last few bit of sniveling trailed off “ Now gather in and let me lay down a play of action for you”. They gathered, and I laid it down.

“Remember” I said “Make sure the Sasquatch hits every bathroom twice…and don’t miss the break room fridge.” The plan proper hatched I gather my things and headed for the elevator…that I might begin my time in exile.

 

 

 

Halfway down the elevator stopped, in stepped the Nefarious Chairman Zhang and quartet of his elite Mongolian enforcers.

“On your way out, Mr. Valliant? So sad you won’t be around for silly hat day next week; we are having a barbeque and firing two hundred people for failing to meet the dress code”. Zhang chittered smugly.

I met his malicious glare. “Zhang… you Malaysian sweat whore, when will you learn that evil never triumphs over marginally less evil. Here’s how it will go down. I will :

1- Go home and take a hot bath in the hallway

2- Play a game of “lusty conquistador and gullible Aztec property assessor” with Esmeralda.

3- Work on my musical stage play “ Hiroshima: at least were not Nagasaki”

4- Sleep like baby on booze and barbiturates.

5- Then be back here first thing in morning with an apology and an pay raise.”

Zhang squinted eyes blossomed into incredulous half ovals “Fool! You are the most foolish of fools. Were I have contest to ascertain to most foolish person in world I would bar you entry: as you would surely win…and It would give me pleasure to deny you that victory.”

I shrugged. “Fine, I’ll use the free time to enter that “Who’s railed Zhang’s wife the most” contest I’ve been considering. I hear the prize this year is not having to rail your whore of a wife anymore.”

Zhang hung his head. “They said they weren’t holding that this year. Why must she shame me so.” I actually felt a little bad.

 

The elevator stopped and I removed myself from premises.

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• Duplictious Cripples
• Limited Technical Skills
• To Kill a King
• The Seige
• Bring your Kid to Work Day
• Bring your kids to Work Day 2
• The Efficiency Objective